Things that make you Oh Ma Gawd… Part 2 13, November, 2009

I must now introduce you to the website which has recently become my favourite laugh-a-lot pastime… its called the people of walmart… USA! USA! USA!

someone thought they'd pull some a$$ if they wore piggy ears...

"where's ma Sherman!? Sherman! Sherman! Sherman!"

Dude I know this guy!!!! Kilgore Trout is dat yoU!???? ... Oh yeah Alaska called they want their witch doctor back

oh ma gawd

peekaboo, we can unfortunately still see you

I guess the Wizard of Oz ran out of courage..but you can always find it at WalMart

So Santa doesnt live in the North Pole! he lives in Tennesee!

Mullet? Check. Stupid drinking t-shirt? Check. Proud of it? Check. Armed? Hell Yeah!

Inspiration for the movie Dazed and Confused

so your dick was dry and cracked due to exposure to the wind?I guess the GFC (global finacial crisis) got to Batman tooWow! Lets count the ways this guys has slapped every Corvette owner in the face. (1) Put a Corvette rear on his truck (2) the Corvette rear is painted 3 different colors (3) He put a spoiler on the Corvette rear….Waldo is so much easier to find when he’s out of the closet. california

Respect and Class thanks for showin us that youre an ass...

Australia and its Boat People..or FOBs… 30, October, 2009

Im taking a page out of bearman cartoon’s book and posting the following cartoon:

 Australia is known as the land of the aussies…the shrimp on the barbe..crocodile Dundee and such. How did this land come to be? Boat people of course. Geez we are a forgetful bunch crying out about these new boat people coming on to our shores… how dare they huh? well…what goes around comes around…

Generation U – the uncontrolable generation 20, October, 2009

Child discipline these days is full of beaurocracy and weakness. I don’t agree with hitting children necessarily but I don’t agree that a smack on the bottom or a smack on the hand is abuse.

There are so many stories nowadays where parents who are trying to discipline their children are unjustly being taken to court and prosecuted for trying to correct a child’s bad behaviour. There are cases where parents have overstepped the mark and have gone overboard in physical punishment but more and more parents are being left with no power over their children.

Child protection agencies have gone after two mothers who disciplined their children with a smack with a wooden spoon. One mother cautioned the other taken is facing charges because the spoon left a red mark on her son’s arm. Meanwhile these very same child protection agencies IGNORED the plight of 21 children living (several suffering illnesses) in Adelaide, despite having reports of abuse. They took the sweet time to even act upon these concerns, another case where a little girl was found starving to death, another case where children had been living in a cage for 2 years, child protection agencies FAILED to act in a timely manner.

But a parent who was trying to discipline their child who was bullying his younger siblings and misbehaving in a public place over his parents not buying him an Xbox simply because he wanted it was charged. Now this child is laughing his head off throwing this charge in his parents face and the parents are no longer able to discipline in any form. They cannot do timeout, they cannot take away toys or preclude him from activities as a form of punishment. This child believes he is free, that he can do whatever he wants because the law is on his side. This is the wrong lesson that this child is learning. This child will grow up without learning; about consequences for his actions, to treat others respectfully, treat elders respectfully, that money doesn’t grow on trees, that throwing tantrums wont get you everything you want. One day this child will no longer have the protection of the child protection agencies and the government and when they feel that they can blatantly flaunt laws of any kind they will probably grow up and break into homes steal, commit assault on another person and think that its fine because THEY are untouchable. When that day comes the general public opinion will be “oh those parents did a very bad job with him” and the government will say “parents need to take more responsibility for their children” however THEY TOOK THIS AWAY FROM PARENTS. How can a parent be a parent if they are not allowed to??

Are we protecting children or creating generations of undisciplined, ill-equipped human beings who will not be able to cope with the real world out there?

One article that made me laugh was the report that the BBC (British Broadcasting Corporation) changed the lyrics, moral of the story and other meanings for nursery rhymes. This is truly a sign of the times.

 In order to protect the children from being upset the nursery rhyme of Humpty Dumpty was changed.

Original:

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall

Humpty Dumpty had a great fall

All the king’s horses and all the king’s men

Couldnt put humpty together again

 

Now I am not old, im in my mid twenties and clearly remember learning this rhyme when I was little. I do not recall having night terrors or nightmares because Humpty Dumpty couldn’t be put together again. I don’t recall any of my friends then and friends now who don’t recall being upset by this.

But apparently the BBC programming heads decided that it was too traumatic for children and changed it to

 

BBC Version:

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall

Humpty Dumpty had a great fall

All the king’s horses and all the king’s men

Put humpty together again and made him happy again

 

GIVE ME A BREAK!

 

What bunch of tossers!

Oh little miss muffet no longer runs away from the spider she becomes friends with her too.

This sugar coating of every aspect of a child’s life and growing up in a society where they are told that they do nothing wrong, never get properly disciplined (cause if they do they can charge their parents with assault), they are wrapped up in cotton wool so that nothing can hurt them. WAKE UP PEOPLE these children will NEVER survive in the real world.

The world is not made up of eternal happy endings and a world of perpetual happiness. Children need to learn that yes there may be times of unhappiness, that there may be times of great tribulation personally etc but that with the right attitude and hard work any problems can be overcome and success can flourish.

Governments you are bringing more generational problems on to yourselves by taking parents rights away. When will you be supportive of parents and other caregivers right’s? The pendulum has swung too far. Children do need protection I agree but they cannot be in charge. Will you protect teachers and parents from children who assault school teachers and their own parents for not getting their way? Where is this society heading?

David Letterman – A willy too far.. 7, October, 2009

Ive never thought David Letterman was funny, however, this week I find him hilarious. I can imagine him saying “Ok you got me.. i sleep with my staff… what?  no not the stick kind..the human kind”.

I posted this as a comment on Bearman Cartoons as a response to his top 10 reasons to sleep with David Letterman. So here are my top 10 reasons to sleep with David Letterman:

10. Your hair wont get caught between his teeth.

9. Paul Shaffer will play a little jingle while you two crazy kids are at it

8. Obama will campaign under “Can America forgive David for this?… YES WE CAN!”

7. The cast of The Brady Bunch will be so proud. Especially Mrs Brady.

6. You will get your 15 minutes of fame as the new Bachelorette

5. Kanye West will interrupt your national tv apology claiming that he was the best one David slept with all year.

4. Beyonce will release a single called “If you liked it then you shoulda put a lid on it

3. It will make the staff at the Oprah show jealous

2. Your sugardaddies.com profile will skyrocket through the roof in popularity with all the old ugly rich men thinking they have a chance.

and the number 1 reason to sleep with David Letterman is…

He will smoke his cigar instead of……

 

copyright 2009 susispice.wordpress.com

oh Im sorry… you cluts! 5, October, 2009

Thank you! Thanks! Im sorry! Pardon me! Oopps excuse me!… thats me lil miss politeness. Sometimes i think im a little too polite. I have grown a backbone from the days where I wouldn’t even complain if the fries I got were moldy..i would probably just eat around the mold to save myself the embarrassment of claiming my own rights.

 But the fault still remains. I was brought up with good manners: “susi spice Ju mus say sanku always. Peepol do ju a favour and ju mus say sanku. Ju are a good girl.” So from whence I was a baby I learned thank you, excuse me and please in 2 languages and was always corrected when I forgot to say it.

 I have noticed that I often say thank you to people even when I am the one that has done them a favour. Today for example I was leaving my office to go buy something to eat for lunch – the fact that it was a packet of bbq rib flavoured chips is irrelevant people let’s focus on the event alright? –  Deeann walks out of the elevator with her hands full with her sandwich, drink and handbag struggling to reach for her security pass to enter our office. During those precious seconds, where the elevator door was open and I could just jump in there right then and there and not wait for another 5 – 10 mins because our building elevators are operated by little green turtles who are part of a union and probably on a union sanctioned coffee break… i think… should I help her open the door or should I just jump into the elevator… I was truly torn…. help her or help myself… I breathed a defeatists sigh and ran to help her open the door then leaped like the flash to press the elevator button… the doors had closed… I thought I hadn’t made it..just as i turn around thinking here we go…settle in for a long wait.. the very same doors magically open!!!! Karma had rewarded my good manners for once! Yay!! And as I climbed into the elevator Deeann says “ahh you made it” and I reply with “thank you!!” and the doors close…. why the hell did I say thank you!???? She didn’t help me get my elevator! In fact she played a crucial role in the possibility of me NOT getting the elevator…

 I do this quite often.. someone bumps into me in the shops while I am stationary minding my own business as close to the stand as possible and I apologise to them. Its a sick habit! Sick i tells ya!

 I have bouts of assertiveness – there will be times where I will NOT apologise for anything I do… unfortunately often they have been times when i truly was at fault and should have apologised but the good thing is that i am growing in my assertiveness. I know I can be assertive and overcome this horrid affliction with which I suffer… I just need to ensure that I learn to control it and apply it in the right circumstances.

Internet Dating killed Video Dating 24, September, 2009

Ok so ive not written for a while. And for this i apologise. Some have accused me of blog abandonment just because I started dating someone and this has turned out to be such a great relationship. Happy = blog abandonment. I don’t see it this way, I see it as I had nothing more to whinge about, nor did I have any more stupid dating stories to tell and I guess I was happy enough to no longer cry or be depressed about being single.

 I am lucky, its going very well. 7 months and counting! Hopefully it will keep getting better. I met my boyfriend through my dancing. We both went to the same salsa dance school and now we both are assistant dance teachers.

 As you may have read in previous posts I was forced into the internet dating phenomenon, which lasted about 3 weeks and 3 horrible dates (money sucking leach, cankles man and the bogan druggy) and to which I hope I NEVER return.

 It got me thinking how did people before us meet people? I interviewed 3 couples from my mum’s church who had been married for at least 30 years. I asked the following questions:

 How did you meet?

Couple #1 married for 30 years: We met at dance in the town we lived in through some friends.

Couple #2 married for 40 years: We were introduced by friends, whom at the time were dating.

Couple #3 married for 50 years: We were highschool sweethearts, and never looked back.

 So why is it that so many people, and I include myself in this when I was single, complain that there is never anyone good out there or least the good ones are taken. The populations have grown exponentially since the couples above met each other. Is it that too much choice makes us too choosy and therefore we always think that we can do better? Or is it that natural selection has fallen behind schedule and cant keep up with the birth rate?

 Lets look history. Generally around turn of the last century people were usually set up by family’s. By the 1940’s and 50’s we even had propaganda about “going steady” and the dangers of that. Advice given publicly and in homes that people should date lots first without any commitment, find out how they felt with many different people before deciding to “go steady”. The mother’s would advise their daughters to not “make a habit of dating” with the same boy as it might drift into “going steady”. While you were not thinking marriage, you didn’t go steady with anyone. Once a young person thought of marriage then you could think about going steady to find out if they were the one. In Essentials we are still of the same frame of mind.

 In the 1960’s the swinger was born. Carefree singles living in single’s complexes and attending single’s only events. Marriage was less in the minds of those dating and focus was more on having fun and enjoying singledom. Marriage was not even considered until people were 25! Imagine that! Nearly over the hill there… *note sarcasm*

 And then we come to the 80’s. Ah the 80’s the era that brought us Ferris Buler’s Day Out, Caddy Shack, Cannonball Run and other classics brought us the era of video dating…….

We all Love a Wedding party 2! 1, September, 2009

As my best friend says....every pot has its lid... not much else i can say...

 

Yup...she makes herself look all sweet now......

 

but wait till after then wedding...we have all seen 'The Grudge' right?...yup thats her!

 

Goths wedding... hmmm isnt that contradicting what they are about??

 

have to admit they are good costumes..

 

I like the colour blue....

 

I guess once a goth always a goth?

 

um..... i think you forgot your skirts...please.... please....go get them...

 

omg..who died.....??

 

that poor woman...i guess the people in the photo above were going to her funeral?...no? what do you mean the bride???

 

oh... the bride and groom... in all their... deathly glory?

We All Love a Wedding! 21, August, 2009

So its been a while since ive posted. Im sorry, ive had no motivation or inspiration. I hope to get it back soon. J

 But in the meantime I wanted to share some tragic wedding pictures that might give those of you searching for ideas… some food for thought…. enjoy!!

"We are going to look so cool in this pic"

 

"and by the power invested in me I pronounce you man and wife... you have 15 seconds to start runnin before i come-a shottin ya consarnit!"

 

"We is ready for combat when da muslim come"

 

"enjoy the day bitch cause the honeymoon is mine"

 

"Ofcourse i married her for her bre...breains... thats how we say brains in the south..breains... *swish that was a good save*"

 

"i cant believe I married the handsomest boy in school"

 

I think some catholic girl got pregnant and this was the only way to hide it from her minster father... "ill just tell him we are married tomorrow... or the day after his hangover... he wont know the difference..."

 

I iz told J'Qkwan dat we aint not having no bastard baby. Bitch we iz gettin' married Today!

 

"I pronounce you Bro and Ho"

 

how old are these ppl!? ... Watcha been smokin willis!?

 

"Its OK no one's looking"

 

Ok, laugh all you want.. but gotta give coutos for the cake... damn well made cake..

 

lady bugs?

 

The dress is actually a mermaid costume

 

"So baby... you and me first dance.. you iz ma woman"

 

Again the mermaid constume...

 

"the invite did say classy dress"

 

Let me introduce you to the Mother and Father of the bride...

 

Cinderella's carriage.... hired out for 60Pounds... due back by 11pm or at midnight it turns into a pumpkin

 

The bride... somewhere in there..

 

Its nice to see that the brides ideas will live on in the next generation

 

um.... ok....is fantasy going too far u think?

Im not drunk! Im Ethnic! 25, June, 2009

There are plenty of arguments held over this thing we call multiculturalism. A recent study allegedly found that the majority of Australians were in favour of multiculturalism but at the same time were afraid of the effects of multiculturalism would have on racial harmony if it was not managed well.

 For those of you who do not know what multiculturalism is I will give you one definition as defined by the South Australian Multicultural and Ethnic Affairs Commission Act 1980, “policies and practices that recognise and respond to the ethnic diversity of the South Australia community and have as their primary objects the creation of conditions under which all groups and members of the community may:

• Live and work together harmoniously.
• Fully and effectively participate in, and employ their skills and talents for the benefit of, the economic, social and cultural life of the community.
• Maintain and give expression to their distinctive cultural heritages.

 Essentially saying you have a right to express your culture, be who you are and that in you will be valued for it in the workplace and social settings also.

 Now given that you understand what this is lets follow the story that appeared in one of our newspapers today:

 ”Bartenders fined for serving a high five”

 A high five was not a drink or some sort of underground bootlegged banned alcohol. It was literally a high five. It further explains

 “Ivan Pancho was confronted by an undercover police officer and frogmarched out of the …club after he high-fived a friend before ordering a blue lagoon cocktail. The two barmaids were fined, one for preparing the drink and another for serving it… A staff insider said Mr Pancho…was in no way intoxicated and was a well-known club regular who was always friendly and well behaved…

 They [police] told the manager that her [police] grounds for kicking me out was that I gave someone a high-five. Come on, West Tigers were playing”

 Ok so let’s link this back to the multiculturalism thing. Ivan Pancho is clearly ethnic (see picture below). Lets face it, how many ethnic people do you know who are quiet, non talkative and expressionless? I think that Ivan Pancho was probably having a great ol’ time and enjoying the football game. The man probably had a booming voice as he laughed and talked out loud and it pissed off this undercover police who’s version of shouting is barely audible by an ant. I think this police officer was getting jealous that he wasn’t paying her attention or maybe they were jealous that his team was beating her team.  Yes I know that people will say, well maybe he was drunk and was out of order… well given that the staff who were there watching him say that he was NOT intoxicated and that he was NOT misbehaving or causing trouble should have been enough to NOT give the bartenders a fine and NOT kick the guy out.

Ivan Pancho

 This police officer was out of order, this police officer needs to have some training in understanding other cultures and how they behave.

 Us ethnics do not sit around knitting wool and drinking cups of tea and think that is a jolly good time… to us it would be the beginning of insanity.

 My neighbours are two African guys and when they are home and playing on their Wii you can hear them laughing and joking around even when I have my door closed. But I know that it is how they are, it is their culture.

 Other cultures will speak to each other as if they are fighting but they are not, ever been to a Greek wedding or party? Its awesome! Everyone talks, everyone laughs, and everyone dances.

 Arabs – when you hear them talking to each other you would think they are constantly telling each other off, they not doing that necessarily its just culture its the expressionist in them.

 The latinos – my people… come on! we are in the middle of a war zone and still manage to put on a big street party with bands and dancing plenty of food and drink no one necessarily gets trashed or drunk but people are talking and expression every emotion they feel. When we are watching football games or the world cup we are the first to be banging drunks, blowing whistles, singing at the top of our lungs in support of our team.. we are not drunk… we are just emotion crazy!

 What this undercover police person needs to understand is that it is the way it is, ethnic people will express anger, sadness and happiness in loud vocal and demonstrative ways it doesn’t mean we are drunk and disorderly. If anything we should arrest you for being plain BORING!

Ma’… Tha rains is ‘ere! tha rains is ‘ere! 22, May, 2009

The weatherman had been telling us all week “watch out for the rain tomorrow, forecast is for showers and a possible storm later”, all week it had been nothing but blue skies, sunshine lolliepops… so of course when I awoke to glorious sunshine, crispy morning and light wind, with barely a cloud in the sky I thought… “i don’t need an umbrella”

 Walking through the hospital (which is my short cut to work) I see some people with umbrellas and think “well, you guys are carrying it for nothing”.

 I had walked into the hospital seeing sunshine and when I got to the other end it was pouring cats and dogs and their water bowls. Couldn’t believe it! As I stood there I wondered if I could do the Homer Simpson thing put my foot out of one side of the hospital “sunshine”  the other foot out the other side “rain” “sunshine! Rain! Sunshine! Rain! Sunshine! Rain!”

 

What annoyed me the most were the selfish bastards who had umbrellas…

Yeah you, you know im talking about you!

I stood there in my dress, waiting for the rain to dissipate… while bastard after bastard walked past with their big huge beach umbrellas that could cover a small classroom of children underneath it… did anyone offer to walk me? NO! The only consolation I had was that because these people braved the strong ghastly winds and the rain they heads may have been dry but they entire bodies were getting soaked as they walked down the street… I waited for almost half an hour… but then I saw an opportunity to get out there… I did not get wet, I had a few sprinkles on me… and when I got to my building and approached the elevators… I saw one of those selfish bastards who had SEEN me stuck at the hospital without an umbrella waiting for it. Well Mr Level 5 IT nerd… seems like you have soaked wet shoes and soaked pants… and I don’t, and without an umbrella… he looked at me, gave me a forced kind of a smile while looking down at his soaked body…..hmmm me thinks… CHECK MATE… mate…

When Your Time is up… Your Time is Up… 5, May, 2009

When your time is up, your time is up…Im quite distressed, worried, anxious and shocked….. Woman’s Day gossip magazine has just devastated me…..

 “Oprah – Just Five Years to Live”

 This diagnosis comes from Dr David Demko, he quoted to the magazine

“Based on her current lifestyle and genetic risk factors, Oprah can only expect to live until she is 58 or 59 years old”

 The magazine article further continues –

“This shock diagnosis confirmed fears long-held by those close to Oprah, that she is far from the happy, healthy person she projects.According to Dr Demko, there are a number of positive and negative things that influence how long we live. While Oprah gains years for her charity work and spirituality, he says there are many areas she needs to address….she needs to slow down and bring more happiness into her life…”

 Dr Demko is not Oprah’s physician.

 http://womansday.ninemsn.com.au/article.aspx?id=279779

 Woah man this is serious stuff! Let me take some time to digest through this…

First preliminary thoughts

1)     If I were Oprah and I read that a Dr Demko diagnosed me with only having 5 years to live i too would be concerned. I mean with all my billions of dollars that I would generate yearly surely I could live for longer than that.

My own mother who is on nightly dialysis treatment as she has no function in both kidneys has lived beyond the time she was expected to… According to Dr Demko’s analysis though my mum too needs more happiness to live longer… Drs said she would only live for maybe 6 months but its now been almost a year and half and this promise has yet to be fulfilled…. With Oprah’s money and the vast resource of kidney’s she could access if she had kidney failure she could just buy one or two or four if she wanted to… that would add another 10-40 years to her life.

2)     This Dr Demko – I did indepth research into this man… PhD he did something no else has done… he has major cred here people… he is the inventor of the Death Calculator… http://www.demko.com/boom0525.htm

Well after you have edgumacated yourself and stop being such an illiteratey you might actually take into account Dr Demko’s credible diagnosis of you and Oprah! Thank you Dr Demko… I trust you as much as I trust Dr Nick….The knee bones connected to the… something..the something’s connected to my wrist watch….

I Dated a Coyote Part II 1, May, 2009

Last time you joined my little adventure I had just realised that the guy I was dating, Pablo, was a people smuggler. This explained their enormous wealth in this third world country (yes i know im not being politically correct but lets call a spade a spade shall we?).

 So yes, there I was in the car with a whole family of people smugglers. They were very nice to me, so I really wasn’t in a position to spout any kind of personal thoughts on that matter. I kept my mouth shut just smiled and appeared very impressed…. they were latino men and of course I had to stroke ego at that point, plus they were my ride home. A few minutes later Pablo’s dad turns to the driver and says, “do you see that car behind us? That Soarer?”

“Yes sir”

“Pablo, Jose, Ricardo that black soarer has been following us for the last 10 mins”

They turned to look and Ricardo (the dad’s brother) said “well we better get ready”

I had no idea what was going on, but I turned back to look and yup there was a black Soarer driving behind us. As I turned back to sit facing forward… a big black case was pulled out by Pablo’s dad… it looked like the type of case you get when you buy a set of hand held weights? You know the type… rectangular black hard casing and well padded and he pulls out these guns one for each passenger except me… do not ask me what type of guns they were but they were big hand held guns. Thick and black with silver on them…retrospectively they were really cool looking guns… but at the time my heart sunk, I sank into my seat keeping my head below the window level… and started praying.

 Pablo’s dad turned and said “ don’t worry Susi Spice you are my son’s girl nothing will happen to you we are looking after you now, you see” he continued to speak softer and had lost any inebriation he had, “The Americans have a little bit of money out for my head so I need to keep alert and protect myself”. The car pulled into a street, then another, as if trying to lose the black Soarer. The car was kept running while the lights were turned off and they waited to see if the black Soarer came for us…

Those were the most tense moments ive lived through in my life to this day…

After about 5 minutes no cars came our way at all. Cautiously they kept a look out as we drove home. About half way home they all relaxed, the guns were put away and I sat up… Pablo’s dad laughed about the incident and we all continued along our merry way. When we arrived at my house, Pablo decided to walk to me to the door and gave me a kiss good night (as if i could say no to him at that point!). Pablo’s dad, from the car, announced, “I like you very much for my son, you are a beautiful girl with a beautiful personality, I hope to see you here more often and hope you don’t escape us to Australia too soon!”

Needless to say I became VERY VERY VERY busy for the remainder of my stay in El Salvador and just unfortunately was caught up in so many family events and do’s that I never could go out with Pablo again.

Meeting the Parents 14, April, 2009

Well I have a confession, another confession to make …

 

I didn’t tell you.. but I have been seeing Aaron all this time. I first described him as a little clingy and emotional and baggage ridden. Well, he seems to have gotten over it all. He has proven himself to be a really really nice awesome guy who actually seems to fulfil 90% of what I always hoped a guy for me would be. He did bombard me with his baggage from before BUT in the last 2 months has blossomed into someone really fun and whom I can really hang out with who doesn’t talk about his past so much in fact he is so positive about the future. He loves it when I sing, albeit a little badly, in the car and he will sometimes join in with me so i don’t feel so left out if he doesn’t join in he will laugh and tell me im cute (we will see how long that lasts hehe). He likes to take care of me and when I was sick last week with the flu I felt very pampered and loved. He is attentive, kind and sweet and for some God-only-knows reason he loves to be around me even if I am snotty, sneezy and cough-flem riddled with flu-disease and that has to be special…right…

 

So this past weekend was Easter. We had a long 4 day weekend woohooo wish i had more time off from work though. On the Friday I had arranged for him to meet my mum and sister. Aaron came over for lunch on Friday, I made a yummy lunch of pupusas which turned out fabulous. On the Sunday Aaron was over in the afternoon. We planned to just hang out at my house and watch movies have lunch and then go out at night. I made an awesome warm lamb salad that he loved and we settled on watching Lord of the Rings – Fellowship of the Ring. After a while of Aaron hugging me tightly, sweetly kissing me every now and then I decided to go put some socks on because i felt a little cold. I started having a coughing fit and closed my bedroom door. Then suddenly I hear this huge noise, it wasn’t the telephone ringing, it wasn’t a bunch of plates breaking on mountain of sharp rocks, it wasn’t the sound of a hippopotamus roaring in the savana… it wasn’t even the sound of an airplane flying really low above my house… the door trembling, airplane-thundering sound that i heard was that of my mothers backside…..

 

My coughing fit seemed to suddenly have stopped dead in its track, i felt the rush of my blood from my head to my toes as it went from hot to cold and my body take a deep breath as it prepared for the humiliation I would feel on her behalf as i opened the door to my bedroom and walked back into the lounge where Aaron was waiting..the lounge that adjoins the kitchen… that has no door… I then made a 180° turn and tried to run out of my bedroom that I almost tripped over my own shoe… and arrived at the kitchen with baited breath “ MUM!!!” and she calmly turns to me and whispers “shhhhh don’t make a scene, he didn’t hear it” in amazement I said to her “I was in my bedroom at the end of the house with my bedroom door closed and I heard you and now is the time that you choose to whisper!???”

 

She didn’t much after that, she giggled and said, ‘it wasn’t that bad’. I as the trooper I am walked back into that lounge room to find Aaron startled, with a tiny little grin on his face not knowing what to say… all i could do was apologise… over and over and over again..

 

The man then kissed me and said, “i still want to be with you, no matter what” and that has to say something special about him.. right…

Susi Spice is on Twitter! 9, April, 2009

Yo peeps, you know I hate following fads. I still refuse to read one line of the Twilight series or see the movie but I have, ala, given in to Twitter. Susispice on Twitter!!!!

now all i have to do is figure out how to use the dam thing

I Wanna Do the Blu-Tack Challenge!!!! 9, April, 2009

Well as ive mentioned before I do not like to really talk about my work place but really I just couldn’t go past this email that went around just 2 minute ago that I felt it my duty to share it with you all.. I just had to blog about it.

 

Ok so the girls that work in corporate ie the admin staff that deal with the running of the place, all work part time as they are all mothers of primary school children (elementary school for you yanks). So whenever they wish ask something of the staff that work there they try to engaged you and motivate you to do it by offering you little treats…. Blu Tack for those of you who don’t know is a gum like sticky substance used to stick things on walls, glass windows you name it, without actually using glue. I have included a picture of it below.. and i have included the email which circulated just a few mintues ago..

 

 

 

Do you want a FREE coffee voucher?

 

Then read on………

 

The WA Registry Blu Tack Challenge is on for today only.

 

The staff member who can collect the biggest ‘blob’ of blu-tack will win an E’Sense voucher to the value of $4.00 – the price of a medium cappuccino!

 

Entries close strictly at 3.30pm today and must be handed in to anyone in the Corporate team (Thursday 9 April 2009)

 

Rules:

 

1.      Blu-Tack must be taken off walls, doors etc – its previous job must have been holding posters etc up. (ie Blu tack taken from your drawers or the stationery cabinet will not be accepted)

2.      Any out-dated posters can be removed from the walls in order to obtain the tack – But you must check with Corporate/Communication to ensure that the posters can be removed.

3.      Blu-Tack includes, but is not limited to the colour blue. Green is accepted!

4.      Please remove all blu-tack carefully and ensure that surfaces are not damaged.

5.      Every WA Registry or Geospatial employee  working on levels 10 or 11 of EPP is eligible to enter.

 

So get going….Who wants coffee????????????

 

 

I have a couple of theories on why corporate did this:

1)     They don’t want to get off their asses and go clean up the place themselves

2)     There has been a request from staff to buy more Blu-Tack (god knows WHY) and they are trying to save money by just re-collecting old Blu-Tack and re-using it! It will make them look oh so efficient and smart to their bosses

 

I tell ya man… I gotta set up my own business so I can impose on MY staff stupid little tasks to do..

 

By the way I am unable to partake in this special challenge because I do not drink coffee… what a shame.. there is no incentive in it for me…

And im going to KEEP my little pile of Blu-Tack all to myself!

i actually found it a little insulting that they think that this type of motivational tool would work on me!…. it might have it had been a hot chocolate but noooo they had to use coffee… amatures..